Desperate from Upper Back Pain

I am a 68 year old woman, will be 69 in a couple of months, formerly was in pretty good health.

I believe my back pain is related to the Fukushima nuclear plant disaster of 3/11. We are not being told of this, but we are being exposed to lots of radionuclides, not only Japan, but Hawaii and North America, especially Alaska and the West Coast. I live in Honolulu.

When Fukushima happened, I knew right away how serious it was and have been following it. Within about half a year of Fukushima, I began to experience upper back pain. Part of the problem was psychological, since Fukushima made me feel hopeless and suicidal. Part of it was the poor posture in front of the computer, kind of a twisted position and I spend a lot of time online. Now I am in bed most of the day and using a laptop.

I have been to several massage people and chiropractors and none have given me more than temporary help at best. The pain has gotten progressively worse. I have become an invalid, in bed almost all the time, because when I stand, walk, ride my bike, my back starts hurting, specifically the vertebrae in thoracic region and muscles off to the right, below the shoulder blade. It is the worst pain I have ever experienced. It makes doing anything difficult, like shopping, cleaning up the apartment, etc.

Now I am short of breath if I do much of any exercise at all. My heart can pound hard as if I had been jogging at a pretty good rate. Gradually my appetite has declined and I have lost weight, at least 10 lbs. I look slim, but not emaciated. Now I am at lowest body weight I have had as an adult.

Formerly, I took no meds, avoided pharmaceutical drugs, had a healthy diet, mostly vegan with lots of fresh fruits and veggies. But now, I am taking pain meds. The OTC ones are very little help. I managed to get some Vicodin and that works best, but I know it is habit forming and also all of these drugs are hard on the liver.

My quality of life is so low, my pain so severe and with me day and night, often preventing me from sleeping. I feel like I am dying and I am preparing for it, trying to get my affairs in order. I have spent quite a bit of time thinking about best suicide methods. I just can't handle the pain.

I have not found a doctor who will prescribe Vicodin for me and if I don't have it, the pain has gotten so bad and so continual that I just will not be able to keep on in life. I know it is habit forming, but in some cases it is the best thing. I think mine is one of these cases.

Just today a massage person mentioned fibromyalgia, so I looked it up. Not sure if that is my problem or not, or at least a part of it.

I also had an accidental injury over a year or year and a half ago, a sharp blow with a metal object to a rib on the right front, very near the sternum. It was probably cracked but gave me very little pain. However, it has been re-injured a couple times. I think there is scar tissue and also possible rib subluxation in the upper thoracic spine. I can feel vertebrae there that hurt when I push on them. – Tawny



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